I haven’t written a post in two weeks — unusual for me — because during that period, I have felt almost overwhelmed by the events in my life, mostly enjoyable and of great meaning to me: my oldest son’s 21st birthday, my middle child’s high school graduation, my daughter’s promotion from middle school, two flights… Continue reading ‘Hard’ and ‘Soft’ as Character Traits
Category: Shame/Narcissism
Contempt as a Defense (Mine)
Last week, I decided to withdraw from my contract with New Harbinger for the publication of my book on defense mechanisms. If you’ve read my earlier post where I discussed what this book deal meant to me, you’ll understand this was a very difficult and painful decision. The editorial committee had been enthusiastic about the… Continue reading Contempt as a Defense (Mine)
Anders Breivik, You and Me: What We Have in Common
When an anti-Islamic loner explodes a bomb outside a government building, killing eight people, then travels to a nearby island where he guns down 69 more, we naturally view that man as a dangerous lunatic. His paranoid tirades against multi-culturalism and “Eurabia”, along with his grandiose view of himself as crusading member of the fictional… Continue reading Anders Breivik, You and Me: What We Have in Common
Shame Trading
In a very early post on this site, I described people who view the world in terms of winners and losers, where one person will shore up his own self-image by triumphing over someone else, usually by demonstrating that he’s more successful, better-looking, wealthier, more popular, etc. Feelings of contempt for the “loser” usually go… Continue reading Shame Trading
Why I’m a Therapist
When people find out I’m a therapist, they usually assume I chose my profession because I want to help others. While I derive a deep sense of satisfaction from doing just that, I mostly chose to become a therapist because it was the only line of work I could envision that would support me and… Continue reading Why I’m a Therapist